Attached at the Hip

The Birth Survey

If you've ever been pregnant, you've most likely searched for a care provider and birth place that would be just right for you.  But how do you find out what care providers and birth locales are really like?  It's nearly impossible to get specific answers to questions from providers, and especially from hospitals.  Without this data, we're left to choose from the proverbial phone book, or insurance company lists. Even personal referrals leave a lot of unanswered questions.  But what if these choices could make a huge difference in your pregnancy and birth?

The reality is that the choice of care provider and birth setting makes a tremendous difference, both on the progress of pregnancy and the outcome of the birth.  The Coalition for Improving Maternity Services (CIMS) has undertaken the task of making information about care providers and birth locations available to mothers, so we can make informed decisions about our births.

The foundation of their project is The Birth Survey, which is open to all women who have birthed in the U.S. in the last three years.  The survey gives you the chance to submit feedback for your prenatal as well as delivery care, through a detailed series of questions.  The information is being compiled into reports for the benefit of both mothers and care providers and hospitals, who can use the feedback to improve their services.

If you've given birth in the last three years, I highly encourage you to take The Birth Survey (take it once for each birth), so that other mothers will benefit from your experiences.

Evidence for Birth

It is startling to realize that many doctors in this country are using unstudied, unproven techniques and interventions on a routine basis, on unsuspecting patients - women in childbirth!  A recent study has outlined a number of issues with the common high-tech practices employed in American hospitals, pointing out that low-intervention births are far safer for mom and baby.  They are also, of course, much cheaper.

Consumer Reports has an excellent, concise article regarding the study and the difference between high-tech and high-touch births.  The Consumer Reports Maternity Care Quiz is also eye-opening.  Another report, from USA Today, following this study illustrates just why doctors and hospitals are so eager to intervene:  profit.

There are so many reasons to follow an evidence-based protocol for birth, and so few motivations for the high-tech, low-touch style of birth common in this country today.  I hope that the publicity of studies such as this will empower mothers to demand the type of care they deserve, and encourage caregivers to step up to the mark and give the best, high-touch care possible.

Oompa for All

My two youngest boys both have birthdays in September, so I've been on the hunt for just the right thing for each of them.  Because I'm concerned about the effects of everyday toxins, I try to avoid plastic toys, and I always avoid character-related toys because of the commercialism.  This, of course, means there aren't a lot of toys I'd like for them in most toy outlets.  The good news, though, is that there are some fabulous stores, like Oompa, online with a vast array of wooden, cloth, organic, and European-made toys.  I've been spending quite a bit of time there, lately!

Oompa has long been one of my favorite places to find items for the boys.  Their toy selection is huge, with beloved brands such as Haba, Blabla, Käthe Kruse, and Plan Toys.  We've successfully replaced many of our older plastic toys with gorgeous wooden versions that are so much more appealing to the eye, as well as to the touch.  While the prices are obviously higher for responsibly made wooden products, I try to remind myself that a few well-made toys is far better than piles of cheap, potentially toxic toys.

And Oompa is not just toys.  Getting ready for school?  I was thrilled to find their Back to School section, replete with non-toxic alternatives for everything from backpacks to study desks to paints and crayons.  I think my oldest son would adore the solar system desk pad from Haba.  I've been tempted by the modern-yet-practical desks from P'kolino, as well.  Indeed, there are few things from Oompa that I would not welcome in my home!

If you're as thrilled with Oompa as I am, the good news it that they're offering $5 off on orders over $40 using code "BTS2008" (expires 8/31/08), and shipping over $65 is always free.  Now the only trouble is narrowing down what to get!

To be Human is to be Fallible

I've finally picked up The No-Cry Discipline Solution by Elizabeth Pantley (author of such great resources as The No-Cry Sleep Solution and Kid Cooperation), which has been sitting beside my desk and beckoning to me for several weeks. The book promises to be excellent, if the first few pages are any indication. I'd like to share a few of the quotes that jumped out at me from the section, "Banish the Myths."

You could do absolutely everything right. In fact, you could be a truly magnificent, spectacular, utterly faultless saint, and your child would still misbehave. The truth is all children misbehave. All children make mistakes. All children will whine, fuss, and have temper tantrums. This is true because all children are human beings--young, inexperienced, naïve human beings. And to be human is to be fallible--to make mistakes, to make poor decisions, and, hopefully, to learn from these. (page 9)

Parents are people, and people are not perfect. No matter how many wonderful skills we have, no matter how much knowledge we have, there will be many times when our emotions interfere and we don't react in the best ways. As a matter of fact, the more we know, the more critical we are of ourselves. We begin to see the mistakes more clearly and judge our own faults more harshly. The best parents are the ones who try the hardest, yet they judge themselves by the strictest guidelines. (page 14)

There are several other nuggets that are also worth pondering, printing, and pasting on your wall. But, I recommend you pick up the book rather than simply reading my favorite points! With the experience of her other work and the excellent beginning of this one, I'm quite certain it will be worth the read.

Trust

A job. A car. Food. Relationships. A spouse. Children. Rain.  Clear skies. Money. Peace. Friends. Prosperity. Answers. Performance. Grace. Safety. Every breath.

We trust God for many things; in fact, for some, we trust Him with nearly everything in our lives.  So, why, then, do we not trust God with birth?  What is it about our culture that has convinced us that God's design can't work?

There is a prevailing culture of fear surrounding birth, and, on a broader scale, the workings of a woman's body in general.  However, for those of us who believe our bodies are the creation of an all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving God, we have the freedom to embrace His creation and all of its intricacies.  We can replace fear of the unknown with knowledge of the design and rhythm of our bodies.

Knowing our bodies and how amazingly powerful they are is an important step to embracing birth and trusting God's plan for it.  Babies are not grown larger than a mama can birth (except in extraordinarily rare cases); their heads mold; our pelvises spread; we feel the urge to sway and move and change positions; our uterus squeezes in perfect rhythm; and ultimately, with no external influence, our bodies are capable of birthing a baby, peacefully and safely, into the world.

There is nothing more amazing in life than watching God's plan for life - conception, pregnancy, and birth - unfold.  Each minute detail is so perfectly planned, so that, when it follows its natural, God-given course, we are prepared for each successive step.  The entire process is about far more than the destination of holding a baby in one's arms. It is about physically, emotionally, and spiritually preparing to be a mother to a new child.  The atrocity that is "normal birth" in our culture results in many of these steps being skipped, and we lose out on the benefits God has planned for us.

Trust.  We can trust Him with birth, and witness the amazing unfolding of His designs.

The Story of Stuff

My husband recently shared with me a link to a short movie called The Story of Stuff.  This humorous, thought-provoking video details what really happens in the production, consumption, and eventual disposal of all of our, well, stuff.  Whether or not you're already aware of some of the undersides of our consumerism, I highly recommend this film.  You're sure to learn a thing or two, and no doubt have a good chuckle, as well.

Simple is Beautiful

Simple is beautiful, no doubt!  I have been ogling Kate Quinn Organics and their understated-but-lovely line of infant and children's clothing for some time.  What's truly unique about Kate Quinn Organics is that they have sizes up to 8 years old in many styles, where most organic clothing manufacturers leave off around 2 or 3 years.  Their rich hues are enough to make one's heart palpate!  And, as an added bonus, they have adorable styles for both girls and boys (which is very important when you're a mother of three boys!).

So, why organic?  Not only is organic cotton amazingly soft and luxurious to the touch, it is also free of the many chemicals that make cotton one of the "dirtiest" crops in the world.  Organic cotton keeps these chemicals away from our bodies, as well as out of our air, water, and soil.  And when it's as cute as clothes like Kate Quinn's, who wouldn't want organic?

Babywearing around the World

A friend of mine recently sent me a link to a slideshow on Flickr of babywearing in indigenous cultures around the world.  The beautiful, colorful photographs depict a fascinating array of baby carriers, many of which I'm familiar with in their European and Americanized forms.  I find it particularly amazing how many carriers we use and love today that we've adapted very little from their original versions.  The decorations or color palettes may be different, but the function of the carriers and the connection between the children and their caregivers is the same throughout.

My big boys stopped by the computer while I was moving laundry and were taken in by the images.  I hope you will enjoy them, too!

A Fresh Face

If you've frequented this blog (and not merely by RSS!), you may have noticed in the last day or so that it's taken on a fresh look, with the finishing of my banner.  My dear hubby helped take my original mock-up to the form I'd originally envisioned, to give the new face to the blog.  I'm grateful for his skill in Photoshop, photographer that he is, as he was able to take my description and turn it into a finished product (with plenty of input from me!).  I'm really enjoying the new look and hope you will, too!

"Baby" Foods

A few months ago I stumbled upon some really intriguing viewpoints on introducing babies to solids. While I've always gone somewhat against the grain when beginning solids with my babies (for instance, I don't start until past 6 months, skip the rice cereal, and see food as mostly for fun until over 1 year), these ideas were new to me.  The basic concept is that babies don't have to be, well, "babied" as much as standard American approaches suggest.  Rather than feeding them bland, pureed foods, babies can actually tolerate - and enjoy! - more flavorful and texture-rich foods.  Not only is this almost certainly healthier in giving them a more balanced diet (though breastmilk should always be the primary food source until one year of age), it also gives them a broader palate, so that in future years they'll be more open to more foods.  MSNBC has a great article on research done on the subject, indicating that most of our ideas on beginning solids are more myth than science.

With my older boys, we did try to introduce a lot of vegetables and keep a balance between fruits and veggies.  There's a prevailing notion that giving "too much" fruit will create a sweet tooth, and certainly it seems that more vegetables are not only healthier in the short term but may create more interest in them in the long run.  Unfortunately, this hasn't proven true for us.  In fact, my oldest son doesn't like many vegetables because of their texture, regardless of flavor.

So what if we introduce more textures, earlier?  How about letting infants chew on things (with supervision, of course!) like carrots and broccoli, either raw or lightly steamed?  We've been doing this now with our youngest son for a couple of months and it's gone over very well. He doesn't ingest a lot of food yet, which is fine - breastmilk is all he really needs.  But he does chew, taste, and explore a variety of foods and is clearly mastering the art of eating a bit more all the time.

For more information on Baby-Led Solids (as it's called in the U.S., or Baby-Lead Weaning in the U.K.), be sure to read the Rapley Guidelines, available in English on a German breastfeeding site, or in PDF format (updated June 2008) from Rapley's site.